I don't do resolutions

Why bother? I don't stick with them for the most part...well not in the traditional resolution type way. I make "to do" lists almost every day of my life and that's how I get things done.

So what I actually need to do is make a MASSIVE to do list that encompasses the majority of this coming year. Lets face it, there is a lot going on this year in my life. I may not have mentioned it here yet, but in addition to having our first baby, we are also building our first home! It is a project that is both thrilling and terrifying at the same time. I know I have talked here before about how we wanted to buy a house but I didn't think we would be able to. Well, in November, we started looking at houses. Then we went to get pre-approved for a mortgage and we did! After looking at several houses, our real estate agent asked us if we had considered building. We had liked the idea of building a house but just assumed there was no way we would be able to afford it. She recommended a great company in town and after seeing that they could do exactly what we wanted and stay in our budget, we said "sign us up!"

So long story short, we're having a house built. It's going to be great because everything in the house will be there because WE picked it. It will be BRAND NEW. And mostly everything will have a warranty. The house should be completed by the end of March, beginning of April. Yes-we're cutting it a little close to the due date. Anyway...back on task.

Why do I need a massive to do list? In the next five months, we will be moving into a brand new house and we will have a baby coming. I'm a planner. And there is A LOT of stuff that goes along with all of this. There is a lot of preparation and getting our ducks in a row-there are lots of important steps that need to be taken, and there is A LOT of stuff that needs to be purchased. With what money-I'm not sure about that yet. Oi vey.

I have a headache just thinking about this next part. Money. Why is it always about money? Maybe because I had a mental breakdown and quit my higher paying job last summer and I've felt guilty about it ever since. Lets re-hash. Ryan makes pretty good money. We don't have a problem living off of it for the most part. We get all of our bills paid and still have money to eat. What I worry about is that some weeks, we have almost nothing left by the time he gets paid again. Not to mention that we have NO savings. I talked about how we had a nice little chunk and Brit's accident wiped all of that out. Now, stop me if I'm wrong...but babies cost money, right? Delivering a baby costs money, putting a baby in daycare (ugh...I'll explain) costs money, feeding a baby costs money. And what else costs money? Moving into a new house and everything that comes along with that-oh-and closing costs, and having to put in a lawn at your new house...and a fence in the backyard for your dog. So let me just say that I think not even $5,000 will get us through the barrage of shit that will be our expenses in the month of April and May.

I start to have an anxiety attack because I don't know how on earth I can save that kind of money between now and then. No idea. Ryan already works hard and works quite a bit of over time. I can't ask him to do anymore than he's doing. I work part time-which is supposed to be a benefit for us. Ry likes me being home to take care of things around here. And even though I don't want to put the little man in daycare AT ALL-only having to put him in a couple of days a week won't be so bad. But how can I make more money for us?? At my job, the hours are kinda...well-I average 2 days a week. Sometimes she needs me more, sometimes less. What would make me feel better? 3 steady days a week. Every week, knowing that I'm working 3 days. Every week. I may need to talk to her about this, because my other options aren't so appealing. I can't find another job-who is going to hire a woman who is more than half way through her pregnancy? I have to be careful what I do because we don't want me working full time because then the little guy will have to go to daycare much more often and it will cost more and cancel out me working at all. Yet, if I don't make enough money, me working is also useless.

Do you see why I'm in panic attack mode? It's a HUGE catch 22. What about the medical billing and coding I've been studying? I'm starting to think that's not gonna work out the way I originally thought. Like once I actually get certified, it's going to be hard to find a job where I don't have to physically go in and work at the company for a few YEARS before they will let me work at home. Plus, I've been hearing that a lot of those jobs require experience? Hello? How do you get experience if no one will hire you? I should've done more research before I started this.

So-in the next couple of weeks, I need to figure out 1-how to make more money (how to supplement the income I already provide) and 2-how to save a huge chunk of money between now and April. Help!!! Please! Advice!

PS-Anyone want to pay off my student loans for me?? Not having to pay that $400 a month would probably REALLY help. :)