Morning Sickness=not cool

Seriously? It's not "morning" sickness when you basically have it from the time you wake up until about 7:30 every night. In a way, I love that I'm having this very normal pregnancy symptom because it means that things are going just as they should. The unfortunate side effect is that this is effecting every aspect of my life. I've already started resenting my job because of how shitty I feel every day. I'm sorry, but when I spend the entire day feeling exhausted and queasy and wondering if I'm going to throw up or not-the last thing I want to do is schmooze with customers at the store and try to get them to buy shit or open credit cards. Ugh.

All I want to do-all day, every day-is be at home. Because, at home-it's okay if I feel like crap. I can  be in my sweats and lay on the couch and I don't have to worry about talking to anyone or anything. What would have been better even, is trying to find a job where I could sit at a desk all day and just work quietly. That would be preferable to this.

Or maybe the sickness is just an excuse. I don't have the best track record with liking my jobs. I don't  know though-I actually do enjoy this job-I just don't like doing it while I feel like shit. I don't like being on my feet all day and sucking up to people when I feel so terrible. And I miss my weekends. Don't get me wrong-I'm not an idiot. I knew that a retail job came with night and weekend work. But why do I have to work from 1-close EVERY Saturday  night?? That's bullshit. Make someone else work that shift....and then I have to come back and work on Sunday all fucking day. Ugh. And I do get one weekend off maybe once a month...I don't know-it's too soon to tell. Even the weekend I'm supposed to leave for Cleveland, I have to work that Saturday until like 3-so I'm not even gonna get into town until like 10 p.m. There were too many people that had already requested it off before I started. Whatever.

UGH! I always do this shit to myself. Had I known that I would be pregnant now, I probably wouldn't have gotten a job at all until after the baby was born. I'm trying really hard to not be stressed because I really don't need that right now. But I can't help but be a little frustrated. I just really hope this feeling passes. I really hope that when I get to the second tri, I feel like me again. I need my energy back!